Scared now

[altariel]

So in our back garden we have this amazing cherry tree (now much bigger than shown), and over the past couple of weeks it has been cooking up the most amazing crop (it's been hot then wet then hot again). Over the past week, the local blackbirds and starlings and assorted others have been feasting. Today I looked out and thought, "Right, time for my share," and out I went with a chair and this fine and sturdy piece of Lock'n'Lock.

The birds fled. I went round the tree for a while, picking and nomming, and I may have been humming 'Cherry Ripe'. And then I heard, up above me, high at the top of the tree, a murmuration of starlings. It became a clutter, then a gathering, then a concentration and then a fucking scary load of starlings, all yelling down the road and out far into the fens that SOME BITCH WAS NICKING ALL THE CHERRIES. All of sudden I was starring in a Hitchcock movie.

Well, the other week I faced off a huge green-eyed and hissing black cat - nay, panther - that is trying to claim our garden as its territory and has been worrying the polyamorous blackbirds in the hedge, so I thought, "Starlings, no sweat," and picked on fearlessly. It was touch and go for a bit as they rocked the tree around and screamed obscenities at me and then, WHOOSH - they all flew off. In a cloud.

Now, pie.

Comments

[ex-naomi-ja.livejournal.com]

Cherry pie or starling pie?

Also, cherries, mmm...

[altariel.livejournal.com]

Sadly, they shifted too fast for me to bag them for pie. Next year I'll know how to lure them in.

[ex-naomi-ja.livejournal.com]

You could have one of those giant fruit hats. Sit under the tree wearing that and BAM! Starlings for all!

I don't know why I'm offering you ways to kill and eat starlings.

[altariel.livejournal.com]

Oddly enough, I do have a recipe for starling somewhere in the house. I imagine you'd need a fair few for a dinner party, though.

[ex-naomi-ja.livejournal.com]

It sounds like a very 15th century dish. Do you stuff the starling with a quail and then stuff the starling into a chicken and deep fry the whole thing?

[altariel.livejournal.com]

It's from a wartime recipe book called You Can't Ration These, and "Roast Starling" is in fact my favourite recipe in the book:

ROAST STARLING: After skinning the birds, clean them and roast them as you would sparrows.

[julesjones]

Does it have a recipe for wood pigeon? The local wood pigeons are far too convinced that humans are Perfectly Safe. They need to be read a recipe...

[scottpearson.livejournal.com]

We have a cherry tree in our yard as well, and I make a lovely cherry cobbler, if I do say so myself.

After the gray squirrels help themselves to a few juicy cherries, the fur around their mouths is all red, making them look like squirrels from a Stephen King story.

Our cherries should be ripe in a couple more weeks. Perfect timing so that it will be a mad dash to harvest them before leaving for Shore Leave.

[altariel.livejournal.com]

It has wood-pigeon pie, and grilled wood-pigeon ("Clean, pick, and singe a wood-pigeon...").

[altariel.livejournal.com]

Hah! I love your scary squirrels! There's a grey squirrel that hops around our garden but I haven't seen it trying the cherries out; it might be too scared of the starlings.

[scottpearson.livejournal.com]

My mom and her husband despise starlings. You can be sitting in the living room of their house, relaxing quietly, when all of a sudden they start banging on the picture window to scare the starlings away from the feeders.

Perhaps I need to give them that starling recipe!

[temeres.livejournal.com]

Right, so stripped of all the biophobic hyperbole, what happened was roughly this. A few families of local Sturnus vulgaris, who have by now had their first brood of the summer fledged and out of the nest, have been taking advantage of your cherry crop. You go out there while they're feeding, they get nervous and fly away, because as with all prey species it pays to play safe, but then go back becuase you appear to be human and are therefore probably harmless so long as you don't get too close, but no, you are after the same thing they are, and being wimpy little Starlings all they can do is hiss and whistle in indignation before flying off.

Shame on you for taking food out of innocent young mouths. 'Course, 90% of the young 'uns will be dead by Christmas regardless, but ... shame on you ... Well, shame-ish. We are talking cherries, after all...

[kendokamel.livejournal.com]

Ohnoes!

I'm glad you got the cherries. (;

[narie.livejournal.com]

I am envious of people with a good cherry tree. Ours is very sizable, very fertile and also wholly unpalatable.

Well, save to the sterlings and the squirrels and the blackbirds and the jays. They love it.

[kalypso-v.livejournal.com]

My loganberries have started ripening! Bumper crop any time now!

I'm just jealous

[thelastbassdiaries.wordpress.com (from livejournal.com)]

The only wildlife I get round here is the odd spider (soon thrown mercilessly from the second-floor patio doors (there is no patio, which makes them quite SCARY patio doors, leading as they do onto the Leeds Street dual carriageway some 50 feet below))

But couldn't you set the panther onto the birds?

[metamorphosa.livejournal.com]

And then I heard, up above me, high at the top of the tree, a murmuration of starlings. It became a clutter, then a gathering, then a concentration...
You know, "fucking scary load" should have had a link, too! :)

Birds can be quite intimidating when you realise they really are directing all of that noise at *you*, can't they? I had a similar situation with a flock of jackdaws (my collective noun's just dull!) when we had to clear years worth of their nests from my chimney. Enjoy your pie!

[emeraldsedai.livejournal.com]

My flist is seriously freaking me out today.

[trixieleitz]

That's never your back garden?! Blimey, it has been a while....

Cherries, nom!

[greylin.livejournal.com]

Next time, you tip the mealworms out of that Lock'n'Lock and scatter them at the other end of the garden. I guarantee the starlings will leave you alone. :D

[glitterboy1.livejournal.com]

WHOOSH - they all flew off. In a cloud.

They'll be back.

On the other hand, by then, you'll be fuelled by PIE. My money's on you.

Well done, facing off the cat! It's really strange, isn't it, being aware that you're engaged in a contest of status and show, with absolutely no idea of the rules...

[altariel.livejournal.com]

My god, though, you should taste the pie.

[altariel.livejournal.com]

Oh yes! And that was a couple of years ago, so there's a big herb garden on the left, and lots of plants now!

[altariel.livejournal.com]

you'll be fuelled by PIE. My money's on you.

I don't know, I'm quite PIE-SLEEPY now. They can have the rest of the cherries. I only wanted a pie's worth.


It's really strange, isn't it, being aware that you're engaged in a contest of status and show, with absolutely no idea of the rules...

It hissed first, but I hissed last.

[altariel.livejournal.com]

Dammit, I knew I took the wrong Lock'n'Lock out with me!